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This Month's Featured Love Letters,
Stories, Quotations and Poems
"Hopeless romantics are only hopeless in the eyes
of those who don't believe in romance...."Jean Zheng.
"Men always want to be a woman's first love--women
like to be a man's last romance...." Oscar Wilde.
"A true man does not need to romance a different
girl every night, a true man romances the same girl for the rest of her
life...."Ana Alas
The
Best Kind of Love
I have a friend who is falling in love. She honestly
claims the sky is bluer. Mozart moves her to tears. She has lost 15
pounds and looks like a cover girl.
"I'm young again!" she shouts exuberantly.
As my friend raves on about her new love, I've taken a good look at my
old one. My husband of almost 20 years, Scott, has gained 15 pounds.
Once a marathon runner, he now runs only down hospital halls. His
hairline is receding and his body shows the signs of long working hours
and too many candy bars. Yet he can still give me a certain look across
a restaurant table and I want to ask for the check and head home.
When my friend asked me "What will make this love last?" I ran
through all the obvious reasons: commitment, shared interests,
unselfishness, physical attraction, communication. Yet there's more. We
still have fun. Spontaneous good times. Yesterday, after slipping the
rubber band off the rolled up newspaper, Scott flipped it playfully at
me: this led to an all-out war. Last Saturday at the grocery, we split
the list and raced each other to see who could make it to the checkout
first. Even washing dishes can be a blast. We enjoy simply being
together.
And there are surprises. One time I came home to find a note on the
front door that led me to another note, then another, until I reached
the walk-in closet. I opened the door to find Scott holding a "pot
of gold " (my cooking kettle) and the "treasure" of a
gift package. Sometimes I leave him notes on the mirror and little
presents under his pillow.
There is understanding. I understand why he must play basketball with
the guys. And he understands why, once a year, I must get away from the
house, the kids - and even him-to meet my sisters for a few days of
nonstop talking and laughing.
There is sharing. Not only do we share household worries and parental
burdens - we also share ideas. Scott came home from a convention last
month and presented me with a thick historical novel. Though he prefers
thrillers and science fiction, he had read the novel on the plane. He
touched my heart when he explained it was because he wanted to be able
to exchange ideas about the book after I'd read it.
There is forgiveness. When I'm embarrassingly loud and crazy at parties,
Scott forgives me. When he confessed losing some of our savings in the
stock market, I gave him a hug and said, "It's okay. It's only
money."
There is sensitivity. Last week he walked through the door with that
look that tells me it's been a tough day. After he spent some time with
the kids, I asked him what happened. He told me about a 60-year-old
woman who'd had a stroke. He wept as he recalled the woman's husband
standing beside her bed, caressing her hand. How was he going to tell
this husband of 40 years that his wife would probably never recover? I
shed a few tears myself. Because of the medical crisis. Because there
were still people who have been married 40 years. Because my husband is
still moved and concerned after years of hospital rooms and dying
patients.
There is faith. Last Tuesday a friend came over and confessed her fear
that her husband is losing his courageous battle with cancer. On
Wednesday I went to lunch with a friend who is struggling to reshape her
life after divorce. On Thursday a neighbor called to talk about the
frightening effects of Alzheimer's disease on her father-in-law's
personality. On Friday a childhood friend called long-distance to tell
me her father had died. I hung up the phone and thought, This is too
much heartache for one week. Through my tears, as I went out to run some
errands, I noticed the boisterous orange blossoms of the gladiolus
outside my window. I heard the delighted laughter of my son and his
friend as they played. I caught sight of a wedding party emerging from a
neighbor's house. The bride, dressed in satin and lace, tossed her
bouquet to her cheering friends. That night, I told my husband about
these events. We helped each other acknowledge the cycles of life and
that the joys counter the sorrows. It was enough to keep us going.
Finally, there is knowing. I know Scott will throw his laundry just shy
of the hamper every night; he'll be late to most appointments and eat
the last chocolate in the box. He knows that I sleep with a pillow over
my head; I'll lock us out of the house at a regular basis, and I will
also eat the last chocolate.
I guess our love lasts because it is comfortable. No, the sky is not
bluer: it's just a familiar hue. We don't feel particularly young: we've
experienced too much that has contributed to our growth and wisdom,
taking its toll on our bodies, and created our memories.
I hope we've got what it takes to make our love last. As a bride, I had
Scott's wedding band engraved with Robert Browning's line "Grow old
along with me!" We're following those instructions.
"If anything is real, the heart will make it plain."
By Annette Paxman Bowen
Author Unknown
Don't
Hope Friend....Decide
While waiting to pick up a friend at the airport in
Portland, Oregon, I had one of those life changing experiences that you
hear other people talk about, the kind that sneaks up on you
unexpectedly.
This one occurred a mere two feet away from me. Straining to locate my
friend among the passengers deplaning through the jet way, I noticed a
man coming toward me carrying two light bags. He stopped right next to
me to greet his family.
First he motioned to his youngest son (maybe six years old) as he laid
down his bags. They gave each other a long, loving hug. As they
separated enough to look in each other's face, I heard the father say,
"It's so good to see you, son. I missed you so much!" His son
smiled somewhat shyly, averted his eyes and replied softly, "Me,
too, Dad!"
Then the man stood up, gazed in the eyes of his oldest son (maybe nine
or ten) and while cupping his son's face in his hands said, "You're
already quite the young man. I love you very much, Zach!" They too
hugged a most loving, tender hug.
While this was happening, a baby girl (perhaps one or one-and-a-half)
was squirming excitedly in her mother's arms, never once taking her
little eyes off the wonderful sight of her returning father. The man
said, "Hi, baby girl!" as he gently took the child from her
mother. He quickly kissed her face all over and then held her close to
his chest while rocking her from side to side. The little girl instantly
relaxed and simply laid her head on his shoulder, motionless in pure
contentment.
After several moments, he handed his daughter to his oldest son and
declared, "I've saved the best for last," and proceeded to
give his wife the longest, most passionate kiss I ever remember seeing.
He gazed into her eyes for several seconds and then silently mouthed,
"I love you so much!" They stared at each other's eyes,
beaming big smiles at one another, while holding both hands. For an
instant they reminded me of newlyweds, but I knew by the age of their
kids that they couldn't possibly be.
I puzzled about it for a moment then realized how totally engrossed I
was in the wonderful display of unconditional love not more than an
arm's length away from me. I suddenly felt uncomfortable, as if I was
invading something sacred, but was amazed to hear my own voice nervously
ask, "Wow! How long have you two been married?"
"Been together fourteen years total, married twelve of those,"
he replied, without breaking his gaze from his lovely wife's face.
"Well, then, how long have you been away?" I asked.
The man finally turned and looked at me, still beaming his joyous smile.
"Two whole days!"
Two days? I was stunned. By the intensity of the greeting, I had assumed
he'd been gone for at least several weeks, if not months. I know my
expression betrayed me, I said almost offhandedly, hoping to end my
intrusion with some semblance of grace (and to get back to searching for
my friend), "I hope my marriage is still that passionate after
twelve years!"
The man suddenly stopped smiling. He looked me straight in the eye, and
with forcefulness that burned right into my soul, he told me something
that left me a different person. He told me, "Don't hope, friend
... decide!"
Then he flashed me his wonderful smile again, shook my hand and said,
"God bless!" With that, he and his family turned and strode
away together. I was still watching that exceptional man and his special
family walk just out of sight when my friend came up to me and asked,
"What'cha looking at?"
Without hesitating, and with a curious sense of certainty, I replied,
"My future!"
By Michael D. Hargrove
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